My love for profanity got me reprimanded in an online scrabble game. Apparently not everyone appreciates the “C” word.
When I need a mental break I hop on an eastern bloc website for a quick scrabble game, and I mean quick, ten minutes max. I lose a lot. I have not retained the knowledge that xu and oi are viable words and I am forever confused about what letters go before and after “y.” My ranking on this site is unimpressively in the 200’s. I tend to get randomly match with anonymous players in the 500’s and consequently I get my butt kicked - not dissimilar from my tennis game lately, but I will save those horror stories for another time and after shock therapy.
My ill-fated match was against “Catfish” who had a ranking of 620. I was outplayed from the start and quickly 40 points behind. Catfish had no pity for me and crushed it by using all his/her/they letters and adding to an “o” to put down “brought” for another 74 points. Pathetically I threw in a hail mary challenge, lost that, and was now desperately behind. But then I saw the “t,” Catfish had left the “t” on the bottom row and set me up to use that “t” in a triple point word, oh happy days! Among my other letters was the ever unpopular “u,” unless of course you have the “q” and can figure out some sort of a word, and a “c” and a “n” …hmmm, cun…and there was the “t”! BAM! (Ok, full disclosure, I did have an “o” and could have put down “count,” but “count” was not speaking to me so I put down my four letters for a solid 24 points.) I was quite pleased with myself.
Catfish went dark. Seconds ticked by. I thought Catfish was scrabble-stumped. Two minutes lapsed and my hopes for winning brightened as I thought Catfish would run out of time. No such luck. Catfish came back and Catfish was pissed! How dare I use that word!? First Catfish expressed hurt feelings, shock, and disbelief – honestly, you would have thought I stole their puppy. Then Catfish went on to lecture me about using obscene words and how I ruined their day and their joy of the game…bla bla bla.
I wanted to scream “for fuck sake Catfish get over it”, but I channeled Dana Santas and did a 15 second cleansing breathing exercise before responding with “sorry, didn’t mean to offend, I didn’t have any other letters”. I was expecting Catfish to be psychic and reply, “liar, liar, pants on fire,” but instead Catfish took another opportunity to give me a sermon on profanity and how it is ruining our culture. I refrained from typing in “seriously, Catfish, lighten up,” and instead suggested we play on. Catfish had less than two minutes left on the clock, I had a robust 4 minutes. I had the “j” and a “s;” but I didn’t stand a chance; Catfish’s anger was focused on the game and I was destroyed.
That was my only game against Catfish. No doubt Catfish blocked me. Have I since used the “c” word? Yes, of course, just not yet in scrabble, I am waiting for that triple word again.
When I need a mental break I hop on an eastern bloc website for a quick scrabble game, and I mean quick, ten minutes max. I lose a lot. I have not retained the knowledge that xu and oi are viable words and I am forever confused about what letters go before and after “y.” My ranking on this site is unimpressively in the 200’s. I tend to get randomly match with anonymous players in the 500’s and consequently I get my butt kicked - not dissimilar from my tennis game lately, but I will save those horror stories for another time and after shock therapy.
My ill-fated match was against “Catfish” who had a ranking of 620. I was outplayed from the start and quickly 40 points behind. Catfish had no pity for me and crushed it by using all his/her/they letters and adding to an “o” to put down “brought” for another 74 points. Pathetically I threw in a hail mary challenge, lost that, and was now desperately behind. But then I saw the “t,” Catfish had left the “t” on the bottom row and set me up to use that “t” in a triple point word, oh happy days! Among my other letters was the ever unpopular “u,” unless of course you have the “q” and can figure out some sort of a word, and a “c” and a “n” …hmmm, cun…and there was the “t”! BAM! (Ok, full disclosure, I did have an “o” and could have put down “count,” but “count” was not speaking to me so I put down my four letters for a solid 24 points.) I was quite pleased with myself.
Catfish went dark. Seconds ticked by. I thought Catfish was scrabble-stumped. Two minutes lapsed and my hopes for winning brightened as I thought Catfish would run out of time. No such luck. Catfish came back and Catfish was pissed! How dare I use that word!? First Catfish expressed hurt feelings, shock, and disbelief – honestly, you would have thought I stole their puppy. Then Catfish went on to lecture me about using obscene words and how I ruined their day and their joy of the game…bla bla bla.
I wanted to scream “for fuck sake Catfish get over it”, but I channeled Dana Santas and did a 15 second cleansing breathing exercise before responding with “sorry, didn’t mean to offend, I didn’t have any other letters”. I was expecting Catfish to be psychic and reply, “liar, liar, pants on fire,” but instead Catfish took another opportunity to give me a sermon on profanity and how it is ruining our culture. I refrained from typing in “seriously, Catfish, lighten up,” and instead suggested we play on. Catfish had less than two minutes left on the clock, I had a robust 4 minutes. I had the “j” and a “s;” but I didn’t stand a chance; Catfish’s anger was focused on the game and I was destroyed.
That was my only game against Catfish. No doubt Catfish blocked me. Have I since used the “c” word? Yes, of course, just not yet in scrabble, I am waiting for that triple word again.
